2008-10-15

Don't Know

I am having sort of a bad day because it just feels like everyone is angry and it feels like the ground is shifting out from under me or something. I just feel weird and bad and yucky today. I took Hayden this morning to see a show at the library with singing and stuff, and she liked it a lot. After we got Abby from the bus Jimmy came home cause he wanted to take them to see their grandma today. So they had lunch and then he took them, and I was sort of glad because i am so sad today I am feeling nervous and worried all day long and it is hard to be cheerful for them. I have to get Ben and Claire in a few hours and I am dreading it, and then I have to go to school and I am dreading that. I just want to crawl under a rock somewhere and cry for about five hours and then I'll feel better. I don't know why I'm having such a bad day!!! I just feel like when I came back from florida everyone is angry at me and everything has changed. I just feel so weird today. Major anxiety. :( Today when we were having lunch Abby said "Its good to have you back Nicki!" I love those little kids so much. Sometimes they're the only reason why I try to hold my mind together. Why is everyone angry? why does everything feel so yucky?

If you want to see something more cheerful check ouot my other blog, Slow down Gym Shoe, where I posted my pics from the cruise! I can't look at them now though cause its gonna make me cry. :(

1 comments:

brandonsmom_02 said...

This is how you want to communicate...through a blog?

My understanding was that Jimmy COULDN'T take you to the city because you have to watch the other kids.

I have already explained that it was a little disheartening that suddenly you were not be able to watch the kids on Monday night for his birthday when you have stayed the night before on school nights when you wanted to. He went around talking about it all night long. It would have just been a nice thing to do for him and I know that he was hurt that after all the times he tries to do thoughtful things for you, you had decided that you had to get home as soon as my mom and sisters left.

Everybody is stressed out and trying to get through and feeling taking advantage of on many different levels.

I am happy you are home. Everybody missed you. I thought me and everyone else had communicated that.

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